- My husband/partner says I don’t need a doula at my birth because he’ll support me.
- My husband/partner worries that the doula will take his place at the birth?
- My mother doesn’t understand the concept of a doula or why I need a stranger at my birth.
These are examples of the questions and comments I get from potential clients during interviews for my doula services. When I am asked these questions I explain the role of a doula and why having one on your birth team is a good thing. I use the example of building a sports team. Each persons position on the team is different and that position supports the team. In the same way a doula is a member of the birth team. S/he (yes, there are male doulas) brings her/his knowledge about the physiologic process of normal birth to the experience and provides each client with educational, informational, and physical support during pregnancy, labor, and birth.
During a recent interview I was asked if I would replace the father. In addition to explaining my role as the doula I told the expecting mom that I will be her coach, encouraging her to use her communication skills so that her voice is heard. [tweetthis hidden_hashtags=”#PregnancyTalk”]Every healthy birth begins with a conversation.[/tweetthis] That conversation has many layers.
- Expecting mom & her mother talking about their family medical history
- Expecting mom & prenatal care provider discussing health status, risk factors, and making healthy choices
- Expecting mom & dad talking about the birth and parenting expectations
- Expecting mom & her support team building their knowledge and discussing how to best support mom
When I’m in the birth room with a couple and they receive information that I can clearly tell they don’t understand, here’s what I do.
I ask them did they understand what __________ said (the nurse, doctor, midwife, etc…)? If the answer is no, I politely ask the person to explain it to them again. If by that time the person has left the room I break it down to the mom/couple in real people terms. The look of clarity that comes over their faces is priceless. They are now in a better place to make an informed decision or ask more questions.
What’s in it for you?
Information. Clarity. Confidence. These three words describe what participants at my upcoming seminar will gain. During 9 Tips for Clear & Confident Communication during Your Prenatal Care Visits, August 5th at 12:00pm EST, I’ll share similar tips that will help you to improve your communication skills at all stages of your pregnancy and birth. Use the link JUWP9TIPS to register today and secure your fast action bonus before it expires.
If you have comments about this post I would love to hear them. Share them on my Just Us Women Productions Facebook page where we can continue the conversation.